Relaxed & Forward Blog

Calming Signals: Love vs Understanding

The mare would not pick up the canter. She just wouldn’t. In her defense, the rider was off balance. Every...
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Independence, Liberty, and My Personal Shining Sea

It's officially mucking-in-a-muumuu weather here at Infinity Farm. The horses all stand in the barn's shade and watch me fling...
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Travelblog: Mister Has a Dark Night of the Soul.

Dogs. We rescue them, buy them, inherit them. They are irrepressible puppies, midlife couch-partners or milky-eyed elders with wonky ears....
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Calming Signals: Another Word for Dominant

There is a wild stallion on the ridge fighting all comers for his harem of mares. We think aggression and...
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Overthinking an Undomesticated Budgie

A bright blue flick of movement, almost too small to see. White feathers spark the light, even more startling than...
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Travelblog: How I Stole Paris

I woke up introspective on my last full day in Paris. It's the same way I wake up at home....
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Travelblog: Paris is Like Visiting an Old Lover

Paris is a city full of statues of horses. They're everywhere, I noticed on my first visit. The statues are...
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Travelblog: Late for the Funeral. By Three Years.

Words about friendship and death ahead. There, you're warned. I'm still on vacation, but I'm going to talk about grieving...
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Travelblog: Thinking About Aging in Ancient Surroundings

I was in Newcastle Upon Tyne. I had finished ripping around Scotland and arrived at my hotel, where a group...
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Growing Up: Self-Consciousness vs Self-Awareness

My teen years were pretty normal, meaning total angst and torture. There was that summer that I used my babysitting...
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Nube: Undiagnosable

I hope I'm not going to end up writing some kind of justification for harsh training. Usually, it's easier than...
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Allowing Horses the Time to be Curious

I saw a video this week that I can't get out of my head. It lacked the drama of the...
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Nube: What If This Isn’t Wrong?

My first ex-husband used to tease me about my frantic love of shortcuts. I was always up early, on the...
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The Joy of Imperfection

We are sick to death of the violence against horses. It isn't just the damage caused by rollkur in reining...
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The Gap Between Wanting a Horse and Having the Horse You Want

Sometimes it happens behind a trailer. The horse needs a moment, but the human is in a hurry. Horses and...
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How To Buy a Horse

He was a bay gelding in his teens when we met. A Quarter Horse with a bit of a downhill...
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Horses and Chimpanzees, Or Why Horses Aren’t Cuddlers

  When I first moved to my farm, I pretended to be Jane Goodall. My land was a high desert...
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Undomesticated Women. Anecdotal Evidence from the Road

30 states, 2 oceans, 14,000 miles, 8 months Welcome to our year of living compactly. My dog, Mister, and I...
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