A Problem with the Word “Connection”

I feel it in my bones like a rusty joint before a rainstorm. An itch that flopping around in a dirt bath might not cure. Alas, I feel a rant coming on. Sometimes I just need to vent a little so that I’m fit company for horses again. You may notice I’m not apologizing.  A friend … Read more

The Home Barn and Separation Anxiety

May I brag? I have that strange career where I travel a lot, see beautiful country as a routine part of my work. I never underestimate the importance of the land when working with horses. Horses depend on their local environment and so do we. The farm girl inside can’t look away, whether it’s the … Read more

Affirmative Anxiety

For as often as we’ve watched horses run and thought them the most beautiful of all creatures, we should know better. For as often as we have pretended to be horses, you’d think we’d be honest. For as often as we’ve sat in the saddle with a dream and a wide open heart, you think … Read more

Calming Signals: Love vs Understanding

The mare would not pick up the canter. She just wouldn’t. In her defense, the rider was off balance. Every time the rider prepared for the canter, she’d launched herself forward a little out of the saddle. Almost like pumping on a swing, and the horse would slow down. I’m pretty sure the mare thought … Read more

Allowing Horses the Time to be Curious

I saw a video this week that I can’t get out of my head. It lacked the drama of the usual train wrecks played for humor on social media. It was as slow and quiet as a PBS documentary. It was almost like we were peeping at the horse from a thousand yards. He felt … Read more

Trainer Love: In Memory of Seri

Seri died this week. She was never my horse, but she is part of the trainer I’ve become. Seri was a horse to reckon with. This photo of her and Edgar Rice Burro was taken during a fire evacuation. It’s a testament to who Edgar is that she allowed his company. Geldings were never up … Read more

The Difference Between Training and Retraining a Horse

Horse Training is the process of collecting good experiences. Let it be that simple. We start with something small and then add to it. It’s a simple, patient process we call successive approximation. Let’s say the horse is young, and we introduce them to new habits in short sessions. We begin slowly haltering and picking … Read more

Human Calming Signals: Help Your Horse to Take Your Cue

You think it’s a simple task you’re asking your horse to do. You use an affirmative approach, not willing to intimidate your horse. Then you calm yourself and breathe, and your horse does nothing. Why isn’t it working? That Anna person says it isn’t what we ask a horse, it’s how we ask. Well, you’re … Read more

Training Tip: Improving Your Eye

Sometimes we look back at how we kept horses as kids, and it seemed so simple then. None of them had any of the complex problems that we deal with today. But it isn’t possible that all of these issues materialized after I got my first horse after leaving home. Horses didn’t wait to invent … Read more

Letting Go of Shame and Blame. Do It for Your Horse.

How many times a week do I tell a client some version of “When we know better, we do better”? It’s a Maya Angelou quote, we all know it. It has no big words, we understand it. And yet we cling to the past. We smear shame, guilt, and remorse all over ourselves as if … Read more

Calming Signals: Thoughts About Spooking at Nothing

There are two kinds of spooking. This is the first: It was midmorning on the ranch, and we were riding out. My friend was on the best trail horse in the world, and they were helping me and my young gelding gain confidence. We usually walked through an especially beautiful ravine where the plant growth … Read more

Horses Are Like Bad Boyfriends (Or Why the Wrong Answer Might Be Better)

Horses are like bad boyfriends because they only want to talk about themselves. Wait, let me explain. First of all, it isn’t a pejorative term. I’ve had enough bad boyfriends to know that I prefer them, for many of the same reasons I like bad dogs. Sure, we have to give up having “relationship talks” … Read more

Our Horses, Ourselves: Simple Steps to Having More Confidence

Want to do a kindness for your horse? Perhaps show your affection in a “love language” that suits horses? Did I just do that? Refer to a nineties self-help book for couples? Yes, let me give you the gist: maybe you want flowers but your partner changes the oil in your truck. Expressing love is … Read more

The Simple Truth About Complicated Training

It was back around the time the light bulb was invented. My Grandfather Horse was a lanky spooky colt, I was still biting my lip instead of breathing, and my mentor put a western saddle on her stallion and attached her tackle box and pole to go fishing, (but the same thing might happen if … Read more

Does it Feel Like Everyone is Watching You?

It’s you and your horse. Sometimes people looking at him think he isn’t much but that’s because they don’t know horses. Anyone can see the beauty of mustangs galloping the rocky terrain or a team of Friesians pulling an antique carriage in a PBS show, or a foal cavorting circles around his dam. Beyond the … Read more

Training Your Horse: Spring Fever and Fluid Goals

Ants in your pants. It was a childhood affliction constantly mentioned by adults when we couldn’t sit still in church or school or at the dinner table. Pervasive, chronic, and most of us didn’t grow out of it. I was certain that all the dull talk about patience was just a flimsy defense put out … Read more

The Problem with Pre-Corrections on Horses.

She enters the barn, looking left to right. What does she think her horse might be afraid of? First, let’s adjust everything that is out of place, just tidy the barn aisle up. No pesky plastic is visible. Start with his saddle pad. She’d better let him smell it. Sure, she’d been riding him in … Read more

Affirmative Training: A Cowboy Walks Into a Bar…

A cowboy walks into a bar. He’s dusty, fresh from the barn. Shuffling his feet, keeping his eyes low, he crosses the floor. Voices stop as the cowboy collapses on a stool by the bar, pulling his hat off with one hand and burying his head in the crook of his other arm. The bartender … Read more